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Singularity review one sitting

By: goukijones Jul 1, 2010 | 2 Comments

It's true 1 sitting is all it took for me to get through singularity. Dare you read on ...

Let the Twitter timeline speak for itself.

9:39 PM Jun 29th from #gouki is starting up Singularity Right now!

11:05 PM Jun 29th I unlocked the Secret Achievement achievement on Singularity! - Shockingly not the END.

4:01 AM Jun 30th I unlocked 15 Xbox achievements on Singularity!

7 hours of straight pwnn. And it was straight too, this must be the first ever FPS on rails. There are absolutely no left or right turns in Singularity. You have to bring what little action there is to a crawl to search around for things to level up with. Here's an idea, just give me XP for the enemies I kill, don't make me scour the frickin' floors man. I'm trying to save the world! Not that killing the enemies is any different, they just ran around like reh-tards. Worst AI ever. I did die a few times and then learned the enemies spawn order, I caught one enemy so off guard that he just ran circles around me. 

I guess the game is closely associated with Bioshock, but Jesus Christ was not looking down upon these nubs during the production of this game. Everything is in the wrong spot, too much of nothing is constantly happening around you. One of my favorite parts of the game are both endings. Very surreal cool imaginings of post apocalyptic worlds. As I'm writing this I have just found out there is a third ending. If only they spent more time on the game and not the ending cut scenes.

5:15 Kill yourself. Best ending in video game history.

7:00 Kill your buddy. Rule the world.

8:30 Fuck everybody. Go into hiding.

Pro Tip: As soon as you beat it, restart the last level and do the opposite ending for a quick achievement without having to relive this god awful game.

The game is bugged, fuckin' bugged out. Borderlands had invisible wall like a mutha. Singularity has invisible floors. I swear, I'd be running on a straight path and then something just stops me. I look down, I can't see anything blocking my way. Move forward, sure enough some brick or hose or something that is painted into the horrible rendered floors is blocking my way. Jimmy?

Pro Tip: Just run up to every enemy you come across and shotgun him in the face. Upgrade the shot gun, irrelevant. You have to switch guns when you fight the giant thing on the train. At that point use your mini-gun.

The guns suck, the thing on your hand is cool unfortunately the coolest thing about it is when you get to level it up. After each level ... well uh, I don't know what happened. Nothing ever seemed to change. I got new guns and powers, but leveling stuff up didn't seem to make a difference. Watch this video of leveling up your TDM Device(the thing on your hand)

I played one match of the multiplayer online. Nothing special here. I had no idea what was going on in the game. In real life I had the idea of what I was doing was horrible and I should stop immediately.

Pro Tip: Don't play this game. You just saw the coolest parts in the videos above.





Wednesday PWNFEST June 30, 2010

By: goukijones Jun 30, 2010 | 4 Comments

So it's been a few weeks since I've just gone crazy playing video games. I've already beaten one game today ...

I'm going to finish Red Dead Redemption today and then later I want to play some of that multiplayer. So if you got RDR and want to play some of those new co-op multiplayer missions hit me up and lets set it for after 5pm pst. Don't be a Jimmy, leave a comment on this story.

Singularity ... "I have beaten the game." Stay tuned for my review. If you want to play the multiplayer again hit me up here. I'll play a few rounds with you. It's terrible though.

I've already seen BatRastered pwnn Naughty Bear. Allegedly the man is on top of the leaderboards. Must be only 7 people playing the game. I gotta give it a try.

If Naughty Bear is the game of the week, Kmart has the deal of the week ...

There are a couple of decent games coming out this week. The first action on store shelves since pre E3. Naughty Bear is definitely a game that snuck up on me. I saw Naughty Bear at E3, I had just learned about it a week before the big show. Singularity looks like a BioShock rip off it's made by those Jimmys that made Wolfenstein last year. I'll be giving that a show too. Toys R Us has buy one get one half off on Nintendo Wii this week, I haven't decided if I'm going to pick up Star Successor and Tatsunoko Vs Capcom just yet. I still have a $25 gift card from Red Dead. 

Here's this weeks Deals Jimmy!

Deal of the week ... Be smart be Kmart smart!!

Naughty Bear from Kmart is only $34.99! Stolen

Kmart also has Singularity for $60, but you get a $25 gaming coupon and a voucher to get Prototype in the mail, which is at least worth $10. This deal is IN-STORE only. So get your ass up and out the door, if you want the best deal for Singularity.

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New Catalog Entry - Singularity

By: goukijones May 23, 2010 | 3 Comments

Looks like the Bioshock clone fest has begun. Do you think Singularity will be any good?

I don't know much about this game. Raven Software really hasn't made any games I can remember being interested in. Some of the preview below might give you the "Poor mans Bioshock game" feel.

Catalog entries tagged: singularity


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