Halo Wars Pwnfest a gamer journal part 3

By goukijones — August 22, 2010
Tags: blog journal


While playing an ass ton of Halo Wars the last 3 days I kept a journal of the most pwnn events ever. Unedited, these are the true stories ...

August 22, 2010

2:23 pm Our first match we were Cutter and "The Chick." The other team was Cutter and "The Chick" as well. We rushed the Cutter and sure enough he was trying to get out tanks and Spartans. Fuck yo tanks!! Get railed. Started a second match, but those Jimmys quit right away.

2:44 pm match started forgot what I was gonna type here.

2:59 pm LOL two more rage quit when they see I have 30 flame thrower Jimmys out side his base with 3 Spartans ready to jack whatever vehicles come out the front door. Nubfarm! Fuck yo tanks! I'm not falling for the banana in the tail pipe. You can't get your tanks out, you can't win. Better think of a defensive strategy. Oh that reminds me earlier. Two Jimmys quit out immediately when they saw King of Jimmys and Erik Estrada were their opponents. 

3:05 These two tards had matching gamertags. Poorly done by the way ... "gilmo7" and "gilmo8" What the fuck is a gilmo? and Why are there allegedly 8 of them?

3:28 pm iGuapo joins the party. The last match was a complete railing. Two Covenant Jimmys railed. Slow as hell, they didn't stand a chance. One look at Estrada's army and that Jimmy quit. 

3:59 pm First's 3's match. We got railed by three "chicks." Waiting for next week. 

4:13 pm Jimmys rage quit! Victory is ours. iGUAPO, Estrada, Jimmy is the official Team Gouki for Halo Wars. 

4:36 pm Fail.

5:31 pm. We have been railed again. 2 in a row. Sad face. Break time, time to eat some two day old pizza. Don't be a Jimmy!

8:38 pm The pwnfest continues. We continue to shut down the 2v2 tank game that these Jimmys try to run each time.

8:56 pm Two more Jimmys just quit on us. Guess what they were trying to build. Fuck yo tanks Jimah! 

9:10 pm lol TWO MORE Jimmys resigned! They can't handle the new strategy of the super Cutter rush. Queue up; 1 Elephant and 4 supply pads, start picking up supplies with your warthog. Put your world rally point right next to the other Jimmys base just outside his line of sight. There you will queue up the other 3 supply pads and just pump out either flame throwing Jimmys or marines and just set up camp.

10:02 pm BatRastered has just witnessed the first class railing in person. 14:47 match time. LOL. 

10:18 pm Out of game. Sad face. got railed by to covenant Jimmys with Tanks. Fuckin' tanks man.

Well that's it. The pwnfest is over. Check my stats from the last few days. I'm not going to be playing anymore tonight. I have to get back to a regular life tomorrow. I got responsibilities. Like not being a Jimmy. Get ready for Halo Reach and Final Fantasy XIV JIIIIIIIYAMAH! 


Check my stats on the Halo Wars website.

In the last 7 days I have played 49 hours of Halo Wars according to Raptr.

Team Gouki FTW!

Halo Wars

Halo Wars Gouki Box Art

Jimmy seal of approval Jimmy Gem Winner

12,491 Views
12 Stories
Jimmy seal of approval Editor's Choice
Release Date: Feb 26, 2009

Buy it! 41% - Rent it! 45% - Flush it! 14%
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