Review: Sam Fisher's Michael Ironside's New Movie ... EXTRATERRESTRIAL review

goukijones Posted by: goukijones Nov 9, 2014 | 0 comments
Tagged: blithering-blathering movie-review splinter-cell
View all stories by goukijones


In Theaters November 21.

A few weeks back I got an email asking if I wanted to check out Micahel Ironside's new movie, Extraterrestrial.  The email emphasized he was from the Splinter Cell series.  So I guess that's how I got on this mailing list.  Super weird right?  So I replied to the email ... I'll check it out!

It's one of those movies about some kids that go up to the woods for the weekend to drink, smoke, & have sex.  Then something is going to come out of the darkness & kill them all off.  From the title of this movie, did you guess it was ALIENS?  No, not James Cameron style, nothing that original here.  Just your classic freaky grey tall strong self healing alien with big black eyes. 


What I don't understand about this movie is that when the teens first arrive at the house, the camera pans the backyard & shows a dog just casually grazing in the back of the house.  The teens all hated the dog.  I don't know why though.  He was only barking because FUCKING ALIENS WERE OUTSIDE.  They fed him, they walked him ... SPOILER ALERT.  The dog dies & none of the teens gave one shit about the dog.  

Michael Ironside IS in the movie, but just a few scenes.  He's some crazy war vet living in the woods, tracking mysterious woods stuff.  I'm still actually waiting to see what happened to his character in this movie.  Trying not to spoil anymore of it for you, but his death scene was lacking some serious luster.

This is something I'd probably leave on if I was in bed at night trying to go to sleep.  I'd definitely pass out right away.  Sorry Sam, I'm gonna FLUSH IT.

Verdict: Flush It

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